Katya Orlova Versus the Volcano

Joe Versus the Volcano and The Russia House. Nowadays people wouldn’t even think to mention these two films in the same breath, but back in 1990, it would have been difficult to say who was the more charismatic couple, Barley Blair and Katya Orlova or Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. Indeed the charisma quotient went off the scale when these cinematic superpowers paired off; not only thawing East-West relations but generating a Krakatoa-like eruption of cinemagic.Joe Versus the Volcano follows a romantic scenario that can be traced back to the Carole Lombard film Nothing Sacred. After learning that he has a ‘brain cloud’ and only six months to live, Joe Banks (Hanks) quits his job, and accepts an offer to “live like a king, die like a man” instead of waiting for the inevitable. To fulfil his end of the deal Joe must jump into a volcano on the island of Waponi Woo in order to appease the volcano god.What follows is an odyssey worthy of Homer, taking our eponymous hero from a shopping spree in Manhattan, to a cruise on a yacht, to a typhoon, to an erupting volcano, along the way meeting a parade of eccentric characters straight out of a 30’s screwball comedy; three of them played by the radiant Meg Ryan.In The Russia House the mood is more pragmatic, as Sean Connery and Michelle Pfeiffer bring their charisma to an espionage drama set in the era of glasnost. Ditching the sophisticated, glamorous world of James Bond, Connery plays a hard drinking British publisher who finds himself entangled in a web of subterfuge involving MI5, the CIA, Soviet scientist Dante and the mysterious Russian go-between Katya Orlova.Connery is imperious as the bedraggled, boozing Barley, creating a touching chemistry with Pfeiffer’s Katya. You could imagine these two sharing a life after the credits roll. As Katya brings meaning to Blair’s life for the first time in a long time, he undergoes a transformation similar to Hanks’ Joe.Here lies the conceit that gives this post its title. a celebration of actorly excellence that juxtaposes the “rare quality” and breathtaking beauty of Pfeiffer’s Русская, with the mind-blowing multiplicity of Meg, whose characters combine forces to awaken a man’s interest in life, even as he journeys towards death.The journey to Joe’s date with destiny fully explores Ryan’s remarkable range as she gets to play all of the women in Banks’ life. From mousey secretary DeDe, to red-headed, heiress Anjelica and finally Patricia, Anjelica’s delectable, soul sick, half-sister, who captains the schooner Tweedledee on the sail to the volcano.Fresh from the success of When Harry Met Sally… these distinctly different, character parts gave Meg a showcase that she didn’t get in her later romantic comedy roles. Anjelica is my favourite of this tantalizing trio; her breathy delivery resembling Katharine Hepburn crossed with a kooky California girl.Of course Michelle was The California Girl, although you’d never know when you watch her in The Russia House. With her hair pulled back accentuating her teutonic cheekbones, she played a role that went far beyond being beautiful and speaking hesitant English in a Russian accent. Her Katya is as luminous as the moon that Joe dances under when he’s cast adrift on the ocean. I’d have happily jumped into a volcano with her, or DeDe or Anjelica or Patricia.